Wednesday, November 10, 2010

A Death in the Family

My mother-in-law passed away early this morning.  She had been in a hospice for over a year and knew she was going to die.  In the last couple of weeks, she made a point of calling all of her relatives, including children still in the Philippines, to tell them goodbye and that she loved them.  Many others came to see her in the hospice.

I spent time with her last week, sitting by her bedside and listening to her stories.  She was a wonderful mother-in-law and a great friend too.

One day last week when I went to see her, she was trying to stand up, holding on to her walker.  Since she was blind from inoperable cataracts, I announced my presence as I entered.  She pointed to her left and asked me who the lady was standing nearby.  I told her there was no one there.  When Mrs. Chomper came in, she also asked her who the stranger was standing a few feet away.  "Is that a statue?" she asked.  My wife replied that there was no one there.  How my mother-in-law could see anything, being blind, is rather strange. Still, she insisted that she perceived this person's presence.

It immediately occurred to me that my mother-in-law was having predeath visions, fairly common among the dying.  My father had them too, a few weeks before his death in 1991.  He kept asking who "those people" were, the ones standing over by the fireplace.  No one else could see them, however.

I will really miss my mother-in-law.  I loved her, and I told her so frequently in these past few final months of her life.

14 comments:

  1. Offering prayers for your mother-in-law and your entire family...

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  2. You have my deepest sympathy, Stogie. It's sad to see our relatives leave us, but such a good lady as your mother-in-law will watch over you and your wife from above now.

    Atikva

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  3. Condolences to you and your family, Stogie. She sounds like she was a great gal.

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  4. May she rest in peace. She was a very nice lady to me and my son when we worked in her house.

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  5. Thanks for your kind expressions of sympathy, my friends.

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  6. Bonsoir Stogie, mes sinçères condoléances à votre épouse et vous,ainsi qu'à toute votre famille .

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  7. I really admired Grandma Sally. She was such a sweet, wonderful person. Very kind. Bless her.

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  8. Shannon, yes she had a lot of class and warmth. I count myself lucky to have been able to spend time with her in the weeks and days before her death. She was afraid of dying alone, so Mrs. Chomper spent the night in her room at the hospice, and was with her when she died.

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  9. my condolences to you and your family, stogie. God bless you all.

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  10. My deepest sympathies and condolences - our prayers are with you and your family.

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  11. I wish that my relationship with my mother-in-law over the years had been a better one. **sigh**

    Now, she's in the final stages of Alzheimer's, and we're waiting for "the call."

    Meanwhile, we're on a death watch for my aunt -- the last member of my mother's generation. My dear aunt has pancreatic cancer, and hospice is involved, of course.

    My condolences to you, Stogie, on the loss of your mother-in-law.

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  12. AOW, sorry to hear about your mother-in-law and aunt. We all get old and we all die. I've accepted that fact and it no longer scares me like it once did; but I do miss those who pass over before me.

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