The Meaning of Grief

What Grief Is

 Yesterday I was reading memes on Facebook about grief for dogs who have passed away and suddenly I burst into tears and sobbed for my little dog Kodi.  Memories of him are everywhere in the house and backyard and torture me, knowing that these images are in the past and will never return to my present life.  I have felt for the past few days that I would prefer to die then have to cope with this kind of torment. 

 I think the reason grief hurts so much is because I need and want to express to him my love for him but because he no longer has a physical existence, I cannot.  Love that cannot be expressed because of death is what grief is.  This is aggravated by the question of an afterlife.  Since we cannot be sure that an afterlife exists, we cannot know if we will see our loved ones again in a different reality, no matter how optimistic we want to be about it.  If we knew for sure that they still exist as conscious entities and that they are happy and well in their new realm, grief would not exist.  I will continue to hope for an afterlife and for the end of this psychic pain and feeling of loss.

Kodi, if by some miraculous and dubious circumstance you can hear and understand my feelings, know this: I love you.  I always have and I always will.  Wait for me where you are, because I will look for you when I join you on the other side, and that day cannot come soon enough for me.