Happy Happy Joy Joy

Lately I have this inexplicable feeling of happiness and joy. Is it just Christmas? Yes, I love the Christmas music on the radio, I love the lights and decorations, I love the time off I get after Christmas (not returning to work until January 3rd). Lots of time to blog, nap, watch TV and play my bass.

I object to this. Being joyous is spoiling my legacy as a grumpy old man. I take this role very seriously. I once saw the movie "Grumpy Old Men" and took notes. I practice for hours in front of a mirror looking sour. My ideal is to be a real life version of Dana Carvey's comedy act as "the Grumpy Old Man." You know, sour look, wearing a plaid wool shirt buttoned up to the neck, saying things like "We didn't have no blow dryers in our time. If we wanted our hair blow-dried we had to stand outside in a hurricane, AND WE LIKED IT."

Is the joy from all the good Christmasy things to eat? No, actually I'm dieting and losing weight. Had to. A few weeks ago I was relaxing on a California beach when a team of Greenpeace volunteers showed up and attempted to roll me back into the surf. They thought I was a beached whale. When I protested that I was not, they demanded picture identification. Told me it was illegal to impersonate wildlife and let me off with a warning. I knew I was diet bound after that, and I don't mean one that is merely plankton-free.

In truth I think my goal of becoming a serious musician (bassist) is a large part of my new-found joy. I love having goals, of looking forward to wonderful things. I can become incredibly focused when I'm interested in something, and right now that is music, music theory, chords, scales, arpeggios and wailin' on my bass. I go around giving strangers on the street pop quizzes in music. Quick now, what are the notes in a Diminished 7th chord? If you answered a first, a flatted third, flatted fifth and a sixth, you got it right! The strangers mostly just give me wide-eyed looks ("Is he dangerous?") and walk quickly in the opposite direction.

Yes I love Christmas. Be joyful. Put your Grump act on hold for now. Save it for January, when the Democrats take over Congress. Now there's something to be grumpy about!