Lately I have this inexplicable feeling of happiness and joy. Is it just Christmas? Yes, I love the Christmas music on the radio, I love the lights and decorations, I love the time off I get after Christmas (not returning to work until January 3rd). Lots of time to blog, nap, watch TV and play my bass.
I object to this. Being joyous is spoiling my legacy as a grumpy old man. I take this role very seriously. I once saw the movie "Grumpy Old Men" and took notes. I practice for hours in front of a mirror looking sour. My ideal is to be a real life version of Dana Carvey's comedy act as "the Grumpy Old Man." You know, sour look, wearing a plaid wool shirt buttoned up to the neck, saying things like "We didn't have no blow dryers in our time. If we wanted our hair blow-dried we had to stand outside in a hurricane, AND WE LIKED IT."
Is the joy from all the good Christmasy things to eat? No, actually I'm dieting and losing weight. Had to. A few weeks ago I was relaxing on a California beach when a team of Greenpeace volunteers showed up and attempted to roll me back into the surf. They thought I was a beached whale. When I protested that I was not, they demanded picture identification. Told me it was illegal to impersonate wildlife and let me off with a warning. I knew I was diet bound after that, and I don't mean one that is merely plankton-free.
In truth I think my goal of becoming a serious musician (bassist) is a large part of my new-found joy. I love having goals, of looking forward to wonderful things. I can become incredibly focused when I'm interested in something, and right now that is music, music theory, chords, scales, arpeggios and wailin' on my bass. I go around giving strangers on the street pop quizzes in music. Quick now, what are the notes in a Diminished 7th chord? If you answered a first, a flatted third, flatted fifth and a sixth, you got it right! The strangers mostly just give me wide-eyed looks ("Is he dangerous?") and walk quickly in the opposite direction.
Yes I love Christmas. Be joyful. Put your Grump act on hold for now. Save it for January, when the Democrats take over Congress. Now there's something to be grumpy about!
Friday, December 15, 2006
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