Everyone has some health issue; I am disgustingly healthy with regard to cholesterol, heart function and blood pressure. My only health issue is clinical depression and, apparently, anxiety attacks.
This past week I tried to stop taking my SSRI (because I hate the side effects) and last night I had an anxiety or panic attack as a result. Why the feeling of panic? Because you feel like you are suffocating -- it is some function of the brain, according to what I read on the web. They call it a "misdirected suffocation alarm mechanism." You aren't actually suffocating and you aren't going to die, but it feels like sheeeee-it.
I got up and googled info on the web, and was able to finally overcome the attack with breathing exercises, walking and by taking my SSRI.
I feel fine this morning, quite normal. Just a little tired from not getting enough sleep last night.
Meanwhile, my G.P. doctor has prescribed Cymbalta for me to try in lieu of Zoloft. However, I am not going to just jump into a new SSRI. I am going to do some private research first.
My 2013 resolutions: (1) better manage my mental states (depression, anxiety) and (2) increase my personal energy levels for greater productivity.
Update: Cymbalta costs $300 for a month's supply of pills. Now there's a side effect (bankruptcy) that I am sure I wouldn't like. So that option is out.
Showing posts with label SSRIs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SSRIs. Show all posts
Friday, December 28, 2012
Experiment Over: Anxiety Attack! Back on My Meds.
Well now I know I can't merely quit my SSRI. I woke up with a panic attack, a feeling of suffocation, of not getting enough oxygen. Is this what waterboarding feels like? I took a pill.
Anxiety attacks are also called panic attacks, and I see why. The feeling is one of panic. This is not the first time I have tried to go off the meds, and it is not the first time I have had an anxiety attack. I was half expecting one. However, I had forgotten just how terrible the feeling is, how it comes upon you so suddenly.
All of a sudden, I know what it feels like to be mad, to have the screaming heebie-jeebies. I'm not screaming, however. I might be, if I believed the attack would not end sometime soon.
I can see why someone might commit suicide, the feeling is that terrible. I, however, know that the feeling will pass, eventually. Nevertheless, I can empathize with those who feel suicidal. Mental anguish can be so terrible, so painful, that one might do anything to stop it. I am not there, so don't worry about me. No, I am not just whistling past the graveyard. However, I have had a glimpse of that anguish tonight. Walked a mile in those shoes. Had a look at those demons. Ugly little fuckers. I understand them better now.
I do not, however, feel in any way hostile to anyone or capable of violence. I want to make that clear right off the top. Whether on my meds or off, I am psychologically incapable of harming anyone. That much I know, that much I am sure of. I mention this only because of the false charges and misconceptions that are currently numerous against the effects of SSRI medications (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors). The theory is that if you take SSRI's, they turn you into Adam Lanza. Or Jared Loughner. They don't. Those fellows were tormented by a different legion of demons, ones unknown to me. I have never had a glimpse of that tribe. Anxiety is not the same thing as psychopathic rage. A drowning person has no desire or purpose of harming others... he just wants to breathe.
I dare not lay down again tonight. Or so I feel at this moment.
I don't know how much of the attack is psychological and how much is organic, i.e. the result of an imbalance in my brain chemistry. The imbalance that some say does not exist, self-appointed experts like commenter OhReilly. Sure feels real OhReilly. I think it may partly be psychological -- I fear the feeling of panic so much that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. There is no doubt, however, that much of it is organic, the result of stopping my medication four days ago.
Feeling somewhat better now. Or am I?
Oh great, it seems I have two options: (1) to view life though a chemical haze, or (2) be tormented by anxiety attacks. I want a third option: to view life through a normal lens. No anxiety, no depression, no SSRI side effects. I don't know if option 3 is available to me anymore, but I intend to find out. I think I need more than my General Practitioner family doctor to guide me through this. It's time to find a specialist.
Updates: I googled "How to stop an anxiety attack." There is a lot of info on the web. One of the best bits of info is that anxiety attacks are fairly common. I learned that it is helpful to (1) cool the body down (stand in front of an air conditioner, open a window, etc) (2) take a walk (3) breathe into a paper bag. I did all these things and feel better. Another set of suggestions includes drinking a cup of Chamomile tea. Doing that now.
A couple of websites recommend keeping a journal or blogging as a coping mechanism. However, the best natural ways to treat depression and anxiety include (1) breathing exercises, (2) physical exercise and (3) sunlight. The latter has beneficial effects and the sites recommend a minimum of 15 minutes of sunlight per day. If you live in Seattle, you can get something called a light tunnel to take the place of natural sunlight.
One website explained the feeling of suffocation during a panic attack. It is a false feeling resulting from the misfiring of a "suffocation alarm mechanism" in the brain, making the patient feel that death is imminent. Other scientists dispute this theory, but I believe it, having just experienced it.
Well it's 3:24 AM, I think I'll try to get some sleep.
Anxiety attacks are also called panic attacks, and I see why. The feeling is one of panic. This is not the first time I have tried to go off the meds, and it is not the first time I have had an anxiety attack. I was half expecting one. However, I had forgotten just how terrible the feeling is, how it comes upon you so suddenly.
All of a sudden, I know what it feels like to be mad, to have the screaming heebie-jeebies. I'm not screaming, however. I might be, if I believed the attack would not end sometime soon.
I can see why someone might commit suicide, the feeling is that terrible. I, however, know that the feeling will pass, eventually. Nevertheless, I can empathize with those who feel suicidal. Mental anguish can be so terrible, so painful, that one might do anything to stop it. I am not there, so don't worry about me. No, I am not just whistling past the graveyard. However, I have had a glimpse of that anguish tonight. Walked a mile in those shoes. Had a look at those demons. Ugly little fuckers. I understand them better now.
I do not, however, feel in any way hostile to anyone or capable of violence. I want to make that clear right off the top. Whether on my meds or off, I am psychologically incapable of harming anyone. That much I know, that much I am sure of. I mention this only because of the false charges and misconceptions that are currently numerous against the effects of SSRI medications (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors). The theory is that if you take SSRI's, they turn you into Adam Lanza. Or Jared Loughner. They don't. Those fellows were tormented by a different legion of demons, ones unknown to me. I have never had a glimpse of that tribe. Anxiety is not the same thing as psychopathic rage. A drowning person has no desire or purpose of harming others... he just wants to breathe.
I dare not lay down again tonight. Or so I feel at this moment.
I don't know how much of the attack is psychological and how much is organic, i.e. the result of an imbalance in my brain chemistry. The imbalance that some say does not exist, self-appointed experts like commenter OhReilly. Sure feels real OhReilly. I think it may partly be psychological -- I fear the feeling of panic so much that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. There is no doubt, however, that much of it is organic, the result of stopping my medication four days ago.
Feeling somewhat better now. Or am I?
Oh great, it seems I have two options: (1) to view life though a chemical haze, or (2) be tormented by anxiety attacks. I want a third option: to view life through a normal lens. No anxiety, no depression, no SSRI side effects. I don't know if option 3 is available to me anymore, but I intend to find out. I think I need more than my General Practitioner family doctor to guide me through this. It's time to find a specialist.
Updates: I googled "How to stop an anxiety attack." There is a lot of info on the web. One of the best bits of info is that anxiety attacks are fairly common. I learned that it is helpful to (1) cool the body down (stand in front of an air conditioner, open a window, etc) (2) take a walk (3) breathe into a paper bag. I did all these things and feel better. Another set of suggestions includes drinking a cup of Chamomile tea. Doing that now.
A couple of websites recommend keeping a journal or blogging as a coping mechanism. However, the best natural ways to treat depression and anxiety include (1) breathing exercises, (2) physical exercise and (3) sunlight. The latter has beneficial effects and the sites recommend a minimum of 15 minutes of sunlight per day. If you live in Seattle, you can get something called a light tunnel to take the place of natural sunlight.
One website explained the feeling of suffocation during a panic attack. It is a false feeling resulting from the misfiring of a "suffocation alarm mechanism" in the brain, making the patient feel that death is imminent. Other scientists dispute this theory, but I believe it, having just experienced it.
Well it's 3:24 AM, I think I'll try to get some sleep.
Monday, December 17, 2012
Lots of Nonsense About Mental Health on the Web Following the School Shooting
Every time some psychopath goes postal and starts murdering innocents, a lot of self-appointed mental health "experts" come out of the woodwork to rail against the evil of psychotropic drugs, particularly SSRI's (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors) -- drugs like Prozac, Zoloft, Paxil and Cymbalta. There is a school of thought on the wacky right that has built a near-religion around the demonization of these drugs, almost on a par with 911 trutherism and Alex Jones style paranoia, and with the same willful ignorance of facts.
Invariably one of these drugs will be prescribed to someone who is quite unbalanced in the off chance that it may help the patient with his mental problems. Then the person becomes violent and kills someone, and the ignoramuses start screaming about the SSRI being the cause. One might as well argue that bandaids cause cuts, or aspirins headaches. The fact that the SSRI was ineffective in a particular case does not mean it was the cause of the violence. It has been said many times before and needs to be repeated once again: Correlation is not causation. Don't put 2 and 2 together and get 5.
An SSRI does one thing only: it increases the amount of the brain hormone serotonin in the synapses -- your own serotonin that is produced by your very own brain. The brain puts the hormone into your synapses and then reabsorbs it. An SSRI inhibits the reabsorption, leaving more of the hormone in your synapses for a longer period of time. Without enough serotonin, a person goes into clinical depression and/or experiences anxiety attacks. These conditions are very unpleasant: the patient is in psychic pain, often to an extreme degree. Suicide may be the result. However, I have never heard of someone who is clinically depressed committing mass murder. Clinical depression is not psychosis; it is a chemical imbalance in the brain, and it cannot be fixed with positive thinking or wishful thinking, because not every function of the brain is subject to the conscious will.
What does cause maniacs like Adam Lanza, James Eagan Holmes, Jared Loughner, Seung Hui-Cho, Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris to commit mass murder? I put the question to my cousin, a psychiatrist and M.D. in Dallas, Texas. He said the major cause of such events is rage. The angrier a person is, the more irrational they become. Their brains shift into the rage/kill software program. Where does the rage come from? From a malfunctioning brain, where delusions seem very real and where emotions may be totally out of all proportion to external stimuli. Insanity is not completely understood and cures for it not well defined. What works for one patient may not work on another.
Apparently, a psychopath and a psychotic are not one and the same thing. They're both pretty messed up mentally, but a psychopath is mean and angry his whole life. They have little or no empathy for other human beings and enjoy causing others to suffer. Psychotics may have trouble differentiating reality from delusion, but most psychotics are not dangerous. It is difficult to predict who will become so, and so mass institutionalization of psychotics is not considered a practical solution to preventing violence. My cousin says we would need to know a lot of Lanza's personal history to diagnose him, but at first glance Lanza seems to be a paranoid psychotic rather than a psychopath. Not that it matters much now: crazy is as crazy does.
By way of disclosure, I have clinical depression and take generic Zoloft, an SSRI. I have been taking it for 15 years. It has some side effects that I do not like, namely, dizziness and lethargy. Those are my side effects, not every patient suffers the same ones from the same drug. We all have a different and unique biochemistry. I plan to try Cymbalta as an alternative, on the advice from my cousin, the psychiatrist. I can assure the Alex Jones amateur psychologists out there that their only danger from me is sarcasm.
Related articles are linked at American Power here.
Invariably one of these drugs will be prescribed to someone who is quite unbalanced in the off chance that it may help the patient with his mental problems. Then the person becomes violent and kills someone, and the ignoramuses start screaming about the SSRI being the cause. One might as well argue that bandaids cause cuts, or aspirins headaches. The fact that the SSRI was ineffective in a particular case does not mean it was the cause of the violence. It has been said many times before and needs to be repeated once again: Correlation is not causation. Don't put 2 and 2 together and get 5.
An SSRI does one thing only: it increases the amount of the brain hormone serotonin in the synapses -- your own serotonin that is produced by your very own brain. The brain puts the hormone into your synapses and then reabsorbs it. An SSRI inhibits the reabsorption, leaving more of the hormone in your synapses for a longer period of time. Without enough serotonin, a person goes into clinical depression and/or experiences anxiety attacks. These conditions are very unpleasant: the patient is in psychic pain, often to an extreme degree. Suicide may be the result. However, I have never heard of someone who is clinically depressed committing mass murder. Clinical depression is not psychosis; it is a chemical imbalance in the brain, and it cannot be fixed with positive thinking or wishful thinking, because not every function of the brain is subject to the conscious will.
What does cause maniacs like Adam Lanza, James Eagan Holmes, Jared Loughner, Seung Hui-Cho, Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris to commit mass murder? I put the question to my cousin, a psychiatrist and M.D. in Dallas, Texas. He said the major cause of such events is rage. The angrier a person is, the more irrational they become. Their brains shift into the rage/kill software program. Where does the rage come from? From a malfunctioning brain, where delusions seem very real and where emotions may be totally out of all proportion to external stimuli. Insanity is not completely understood and cures for it not well defined. What works for one patient may not work on another.
Apparently, a psychopath and a psychotic are not one and the same thing. They're both pretty messed up mentally, but a psychopath is mean and angry his whole life. They have little or no empathy for other human beings and enjoy causing others to suffer. Psychotics may have trouble differentiating reality from delusion, but most psychotics are not dangerous. It is difficult to predict who will become so, and so mass institutionalization of psychotics is not considered a practical solution to preventing violence. My cousin says we would need to know a lot of Lanza's personal history to diagnose him, but at first glance Lanza seems to be a paranoid psychotic rather than a psychopath. Not that it matters much now: crazy is as crazy does.
By way of disclosure, I have clinical depression and take generic Zoloft, an SSRI. I have been taking it for 15 years. It has some side effects that I do not like, namely, dizziness and lethargy. Those are my side effects, not every patient suffers the same ones from the same drug. We all have a different and unique biochemistry. I plan to try Cymbalta as an alternative, on the advice from my cousin, the psychiatrist. I can assure the Alex Jones amateur psychologists out there that their only danger from me is sarcasm.
Related articles are linked at American Power here.
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