Bill Clinton Supports Obama...OR DOES HE?? (Photoshop)

Julian Assange Demonstrates His Style of Condom Use Before Committing Rapes (Photoshop)

Julian Assange demonstrates his style of condom use

A SABER POINT EXCLUSIVE!

Julian Assange of Wikileaks has been arrested in London by Scotland Yard.  However, he was not arrested for espionage activities against the United States, but on rape charges in Sweden.  Even worse, Assange is being vilified for not using a condom during the rapes!

Rumor has it that Assange has bitterly denied not using condoms during the reported rapes.  Assange swore that he always uses a condom when he rapes people, and also when undermining free nations with espionage.

Before Assange was frog marched into the nearest holding cell, he demonstrated his knowledge of condoms and even demonstrated the proper way to wear one.  See undoctored actual news photograph (okay, maybe it was Photshopped a little) included herein.  Since Julian may be going to prison soon and subject to homosexual rapes, we do hope he wears a condom as shown to fully protect himself against HIV and SDTs.

Further rumors state that Julian Assange wore a condom as depicted for a Halloween party where he went as a penis.

More as the situation develops....

An Islamic Christmas Tree, an Islamic Christmas Wish (Photoshop)

A Somali (read:  Muslim) teen, who is a naturalized citizen of the United States, attempted to bomb a Christmas tree lighting ceremony in Portland, Oregon.  Ah, the spirit of the season!  Brotherly love, peace on earth, goodwill towards men!  Or not.

To capture the perpetrator's sentiments, I included his mug shot in the Photoshop below, complete with an Islamic Christmas tree symbolizing the wishes of so many Muslims worldwide on this festive season of the year.

Read all about it here.

An Islamic Tree Lighting Ceremony?

New Tie for Muslim Men: An Obvious Phallic Symbol?

I saw this over at Atlas Shrugs.  It's the new Islamic necktie for men.  Supposedly, the new tie takes the shape of the sword of Imam Ali,  cousin and son-in-law of Muhammad.  The new tie combines two Muslim icons:  a turban (with decorative fringe) and a curved, Islamic sword.

Some folks think the tie is just another Islamic phallic symbol, like minarets and scimitars.  I am outraged that anyone would read sexual references into these perfectly innocent symbols of Muslim traditions.  Some people just have dirty minds, but what are you gonna do?

Some people think my "saber" in my blog banner is also a phallic symbol.  NO IT ISN'T.  It used to be, when I colored it pink, but now that it is back to silver it is just a sword, nothing more.  I am so upset by this discussion that I think I will go outside and smoke a cigar.

Eat Your Damn Gavel, Nancy Pelosi

Celebrating the End of an Error.

New Stogie Photoshop at American Power

Yesterday I received an email from my friend Donald Douglas at American Power, requesting a Photoshop of one of his blogosphere opponents, a "libertarian socialist" named James B Webb, who runs a blog called "Brain Rage" (well he's half right, about the rage part).  His post on Easter is especially disgusting, so be forewarned.

Webb is proud of his support for Obama (he "was for Obama before it was cool to be for Obama").  His site bears a quote from Sinclair Lewis that says "WHEN FASCISM COMES TO AMERICA IT WILL BE WRAPPED IN THE FLAG AND CARRYING A CROSS."

Apparently, Webb doesn't have much to write about so "Brain Rage" has become a shadow blog of American Power.  Webb waits for Donald Douglas to post something, then ridicules both the post and Donald.  Personally, I wouldn't bother with Webb, but Donald loves to fight with these people.

The original photograph has disappeared from "Brain Rage," possibly to reduce the impact of my Photoshop.  (It always means more if you can compare the original to the Photoshop).

Here's the original photo for your amusement.  See the Photoshop at this link

Troglopundit as the Evil Anaken (Photoshop)

Troglopundit dared Carol of No Sheeples Here to Photoshop his face onto an image of the Evil Anaken.

Carol declined.  However, I have no such scruples.  Here is my Photoshop with the originals below.

Note to Troglopundit:  if you want to look evil, close your mouth.  It's better that way.

Update:  Yellow eyes added
Update 2:  I improved the eyes, darkened the face and added shadows

EXCLUSIVE PHOTO! Tiger Woods at Emergency Room Entrance!

We were given this exclusive photo of Tiger Woods at the hospital emergency room entrance.  This was following a suspicious arrangement of a golf club over his cranium, courtesy of his wife, following revelations of Tiger's affair with another woman.

Reports from the scene say the 7 iron was successfully removed from Tiger's head.  He will recover.  However, he will have to replace that 7 iron, which appears beyond repair.

We are unable to vouch for the authenticity of this photograph.  Use at your own risk.

Photo of the Day: the Change Express Hits a Pot Hole

Via: Lucianne.com

Henry Waxman Reunited With Twin Brother

There are those misguided souls who think Henry Waxman looks like a bat. They are wrong.

Henry Waxman looks like his long lost twin brother, with whom he was reunited this week.

His brother chose to retain the original family name of Potatohead.

As you can see the similarity is simply stunning.

Waxman is on the right. I think.

R.S. McCain: When She Kisses You, You Stay Kissed!

Robert Stacy McCain ran this photo of a lady in the entertainment industry who got a lot of plastic surgery done. Notice the size of her lips. When she kisses you, you stay kissed. Imagine the sound when she yanks those smackers off your face. It must sound like a bathroom plunger on steroids.

To illustrate, I have acquired this actual photo (as in "Photoshopped") of R.S. McCain, after receiving a kiss from this bodacious porn star. Since R.S. is a happily married man, and his lovely wife hits really hard, the star only gave McCain a kiss on the forehead. Note the size of the imprint!

Like I said, when she kisses you, you stay kissed.

Henry Waxman: Fun With Photoshop

The wireless is still working for now, but I am confined to my upstairs office while they install new flooring below. I watched two South Park cartoons on my laptop and, still bored, decided to practice some Photoshopping.

I found a photo of Henry Waxman that I intended to savage, but figured I need to remove the microphone first, which blocked part of his face. See the before and after on the left.

Below is the same Photoshop with some artistic rendering applied. On the left the rendering is called "Poster Edges" and on the right "Dry Brush."

If you need help with a Photoshop project let me know. I have nothing much else to do these days as there are no jobs in sight; blogging, bass practice, reading and Photoshop are the contents of my day.

And finally, we erase the background and fill it with a nice light blue, then use Photoshop to exaggerate and distort Waxman's features to transform him into a caricature. To make it look more like art, I used the "Poster Edges" filter to finish it off. However, this caricature is probably too over the top: he looks like one of the zombies in "Night of the Living Dead." (Oh no, he'll eat our brains!) See above post for a better caricature.

Use as you see fit.

The Big Shoes of Barack Obama

It takes a big man to fill the Presidential Shoes.

More Photos of Christine Collins

Excuse my obsessing over Christine Collins. It's just that the photos of her on the web are terrible -- almost all of them appear to have been "Photo-shopped" 1920's style, by attempting to paint in backgrounds that look putrid. For example, look at the original of the top photo that is available on the web. In the photo above left, I just removed the ugly painted background and inserted a nice light shade of gray. In the photo on the right I put in an artificial background, i.e. a 1920's armchair and a 1920's living room decor. It's not original to the photo, but looks very nice. More importantly, it gives you a better sense of the real woman as she was in life. And, (he said modestly) the new background makes the photo good enough to frame.

Same case for the photo below. See the messed up original here. I removed the ghastly painted background and inserted an even shade of gray. I also removed some fading from her face to make it a nice natural even color. Then I inserted the same 1920's background to create a second, more ornate version. This lady loved her cloche hats, necklaces and furs. I suspect she would prefer the Photoshop restorations to the ugly originals.

Anyone blogging about the Changeling or the Wineville Chicken Coop Murders (or anyone else) are free to use these restorations as they see fit. See prior post for one additional restoration.

Okay, I'm done. Thank you for your patience.

Photoshop: Christine Collins Photo Repaired

When I see a photo marred by discoloration or other flaw, I get this desire to repair it in Photoshop. Earlier this week I wrote about the movie "The Changeling" starring Angelina Jolie as Christine Collins, a courageous mom in 1928 who took on the establishment in an effort to find her missing nine year old son.

The photo at the right is an actual picture of the real Christine Collins, who isn't quite as pretty as Angelina Jolie (but who is?). This photo is in several places on the net, but in the form below, in which part of the photo is blocked off as if someone were trying to frame part of the picture.

I removed the ugly frame and restored the photo to what it probably looked like in its original state. I used the clone tool and the healing brush almost exclusively in this effort. Photoshop is fun and a very useful tool. My restoration is in the public domain and free for the use of anyone who wants it.

Update: A reader directed me to the 121 photos of the crime that are available online at the Los Angeles Public Library (go here and put "Northcott" in the search window). Many of the photos there had been similarly defaced. It appears that in those early days of print media, newspapers would "frame" the part of the photo that they wanted to appear in print. In many other cases they would paint in a white background or dark background, depending on the photo, to make the subject stand out and appear more clearly in the news photo. They would also outline the subject (as they did above) for the same purpose, i.e. to make the subject stand out against a similarly colored background.

Top Photo: My Photoshop restoration.

Bottom Photo: Flawed photo found on the web.

Space Alien Abducts Rush Limbaugh

No wait, that's actually James Carville. My mistake.

If Carville ever drives through Roswell, New Mexico he'll start a panic.

..

Carville is one of the three ass-hats who are involved in the Democrat "Demonize Rush" campaign.

..

That's an actual unretouched photo of Carville on the left (where else?).

Caricature of Chuck Schumer

Senator Chuck Schumer from New York.

Opposing America since 2000. Or something like that.

His eyes get big like that when there's a huge spending bill to vote on.

A question for New Yorkers: What were you thinking?

Caricature of Nancy Pelosi

I title this caricature of Nancy Pelosi "Balloons" because she is such an airhead. Utterly lightweight, she hasn't a clue on how the world works.

Feel free to use any of these caricatures in your blogs or websites.

Caricature of Sean Penn

Here's a caricature of Sean Pin-Head of recent Hollywood Oscar fame. There was a time when winning an Oscar really meant something. Today it only means your fellow cadre of leftist-America-haters admire your propaganda efforts.

When Penn received his latest Oscar, he thanked his fellow movie folk by referring to them as "Commie Homo loving Sons of Guns."

I don't know about you, but that remark about guns really offended me.

Another Caricature of Senator Harry Reid

Here's another caricature of Senator Harry Reid. These caricatures are really easy in Photoshop; use the Liquify tool under filters and have fun.

Senator Reid never appears to be having fun. He looks like someone with a serious case of hemmorhoids, which in turn has given him heartburn, which has aggravated his bunions.