Monday, January 11, 2010

Synthetic Sex: Will Your Daughter-in-Law be a Robot?

This is truly pathetic.  Some company in New Jersey (where else) has invented "the world's first sex robot."  It is a fake woman with realistic skin, facial features, eyes, hair and other unmentionables.  Now women don't have to fake orgasms as the whole woman will be fake, so nobody cares.

Those of us who are hoping our last remaining son will get married and start a family have a new threat:  a robot for a daughter-in-law.  Unless the robot can produce live grandchildren, that will be cold comfort.  Hmm, not to fear, the company, True Companion LLC, can just do a follow up line of fake grandchildren.  They will spill milk, scatter cookie crumbs and break things by remote control.  When they get tiresome you can just switch them off.

In any case, think of the possibilities.  The world's biggest Nerd can now get a date.  (Not me, I retired from the dating scene years ago.)  It will no longer be necessary to attain social skills, to carry on a conversation, to learn table manners, or even to clean your fingernails.  Just plug her in and she's ready to go.  If she gets bitchy, just reboot.

This all reminds me of an old Yul Brynner movie, "West World," that came out around 1973.  Vacationers to a high tech amusement park could make love to sexy robot women in a cowboy setting.  Of course, high tech things have to be programmed and programs have bugs, and there's nothing worse than a pissed-off, turbo-charged robot...

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